Over-Coming Life's Difficult Challenges

We are incredibly resilient and ambitious
people who are used to setting and achieving goals in life.
And yet, from time to time, we all face challenges that
seem insurmountable, a problem we can't crack.

Sometimes it's a personal goal that eludes us. Sometimes we
are knocked down by one of life's tragedies. Sometimes we
face resistance or opposition to a goal that means the
world to us. Whatever the cause, from time to time, we all
face over-whelming adversity and we need a strategy for
dealing with it.

Unfortunately, two of the most common 'strategies' are to
give up, or to keep doing the same thing over and over,
hoping for a different result. I think we can do better
than that!

Here are my suggestions for a better strategy:

1. Acceptance
Reality never lies, and the first step in over-coming
adversity is to recognize it. Sometimes, bad things happen.
Sometimes our good intentions, our best efforts and our
brilliant ideas just don't work. Sometimes, life is hard
and we don't like it, and the first step forward is to
admit 'this isn't working'.

Acceptance does not mean quitting and it does not mean
failure. It means recognizing what IS, getting curious
about why our plans aren't working, and wondering what is
going on. Always face the truth! Sometimes we meet
adversity and we need to recognize and accept it when it
happens.

2. Creativity
Adversity is nature's way of suggesting you try something
else. It doesn't mean changing your goals or giving up, but
it does mean stepping back, asking for advice, talking with
a coach, brainstorming and considering a new approach.

I love the story of Thomas Edison trying many thousands of
ways to invent the light bulb! He never 'failed'; he
discovered thousands of solutions that didn't work! If your
goal is worth achieving, and what you're doing isn't
working, step back, think of 10 or 20 or 100 alternatives
and make a fresh start.

3. Patience and Persistence
There's an old saying that 'God's delays are not God's
denials', and it's good to remember that many problems take
time. Some require years to solve; a few will not be
mastered in a single lifetime.

While it's true that 'nothing can resist the human will',
it is also true that brute force rarely builds anything
beautiful. I have a friend who spent 12 years building a
magnificent china cabinet. How many 'over-night sensations'
labored for 20 years before success 'suddenly' found them?
The Grand Canyon is the result of nothing but running
water, time and persistence.

4. Give up
Some readers will be surprised by this, but sometimes we
cling to dreams that will never happen for us, and in our
stubbornness, we deny ourselves a world of success in other
areas. We invest too much in chasing dreams that are not
ours! Go where it's easy. Do what works and makes sense and
opens doors for you.

You deserve success! You were not created to beat your head
against a wall or to struggle up a mountain without meaning
or clarity. Life DOES have pain and can be horribly unfair,
but that is NOT the total human experience! Mother Teresa
said that 'God will not give me any challenge I cannot
bear', and we need to remember that. The adversity you
experience is, in some way, the raw material for something
greater. Find it.

Philip Humbert, PhD