Two Personality Powers for Motivating Others

By: Brian Tracy

There are two powers of personality you can develop that will increase your
charisma and your ability to influence others.

Decide Exactly What You Want
The first of these powers is the power of purpose. Men and women with
charisma and personal magnetism almost invariably have a clear vision of
who they are, of where they're going and of what they're trying to achieve.
Leaders in sales and management have a vision of what they're trying to
create and why they're doing what they're doing. They're focused on
accomplishing some great purpose. They're decisive about every aspect of
their lives. They know exactly what they want and what they have to do to
get it. They plan their work and work their plan.

Set Clear Goals For Yourself
You can increase your charisma and the magnetism of your personality by
setting clear goals for yourself, making plans to achieve them, and working
on your plans with discipline and determination every day. The whole world
seems to move aside for the person who knows exactly where he is going. In
fact, the clearer you are about your purposes and goals, the more likely
people will be to attribute other positive qualities to you. They will see
you, or perceive you, as being a better and more admirable human being. And
when you have clear goals, you begin attracting to yourself the people and
opportunities necessary to make those goals a reality.

Believe in Yourself
The second personality power is self-confidence. Men and women with
charisma have an intense belief in themselves and in what they are doing.
They are usually calm, cool and composed about themselves and their work.
Your level of self-confidence is often demonstrated in your courage, your
willingness to do whatever is necessary to achieve a purpose that you
believe in.

The Secret of Attraction
People are naturally attracted to those who exude a sense of
self-confidence, those who have an unshakable belief in their ability to
rise above circumstances to attain their goals.

Assume the Result in Advance
One of the ways you demonstrate self-confidence is by assuming that people
naturally like you and accept you and want to do business with you. For
example, one of the most powerful ways to close a sale is simply to assume
that the prospect has decided to purchase the product or service, and then
go on to wrap up the details. One of the best ways to achieve success in
your relationships is to assume that people naturally enjoy your company
and want to be around you, and then proceed on that basis. The very act of
behaving in a self-confident manner will generate personal charisma in the
eyes of others.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action:

First, think on paper. Write out your goals and plans in detail and then
review them regularly. Discuss them with others. Upgrade your goals and
plans and revise them when you get new information. Be clear about them.

Second, express your level of self-confidence to others all the time, even
if you have doubts inside. Always walk, talk, act and move like a winner,
like a person who is absolutely confident of success and ultimate victory.

Accepting Yourself Unconditionally

How Are You Treated By Others?
Self-acceptance begins in infancy, with the influence of your parents and
siblings and other important people.

Your own level of self-acceptance is determined largely by how well you
feel you are accepted by the important people in your life.

Your attitude toward yourself is determined largely by the attitudes that
you think other people have toward you. When you believe that other people
think highly of you, your level of self-acceptance and self-esteem goes
straight up.

The best way to build a healthy personality involves understanding yourself
and your feelings.

Let the Light Shine In
This is achieved through the simple exercise of self-disclosure. For you to
truly understand yourself, or to stop being troubled by things that may
have happened in your past, you must be able to disclose yourself to at
least one person. You have to be able to get those things off your chest.
You must rid yourself of those thoughts and feelings by revealing them to
someone who won't make you feel guilty or ashamed for what has happened.

Understand What Makes You Tick
The second part of personality development follows from self-disclosure,
and it's called self-awareness. Only when you can disclose what you're
truly thinking and feeling to someone else can you become aware of those
thoughts and emotions If the other person simply listens to you without
commenting or criticizing, you have the opportunity to become more aware of
the person you are and why you do the things you do. You begin to develop
perspective, or what the Buddhists call "detachment."

Be Honest With Yourself
Now we come to the good part. After you've gone through self-disclosure to
self-awareness, you arrive at self-acceptance. You accept yourself for the
person you are, with good points and bad points, with strengths and
weaknesses, and with the normal frailties of a human being. When you
develop the ability to stand back and look at yourself honestly, and to
candidly admit to others that you may not be perfect but you're all you've
got, you start to enjoy a heightened sense of self-acceptance.

Do An Inventory of Your Accomplishments
A valuable exercise for developing higher levels of self-acceptance
involves doing an inventory of yourself. In doing this inventory, your job
is to accentuate the positive and minimize the negative.

Think of your unique talents and abilities. Think of your core skills, the
things that you do exceptionally well that account for your success in your
profession and in your personal life right now.

Think About Your Future
Think about your future possibilities and the fact that your potential is
virtually unlimited. You can do what you want to do and go where you want
to go. You can be the person you want to be. You can set large and small
goals and make plans and move step-by-step, progressively toward their
realization. There are no obstacles to what you can accomplish except the
obstacles that you create in your mind.

Action Exercises
Here are three steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action:

First, sit down with your spouse, or a good friend, and tell him or her
about something that is troubling you and is still causing you unhappiness.

Second, develop perspective on your problem by standing back from it and
imagining that it was happening to someone else. What advice would you give
to that person?

Third, think continually about the good experiences and accomplishments you
have enjoyed in the past. Remind yourself regularly that you are a pretty
good person and you've done a lot of good things in your life.

Author: Brian Tracy

4 Essentials for Happiness

You may have a thousand different goals over the course of your lifetime,
but they all will fall into one of four basic categories. Everything you do
is an attempt to enhance the quality of your life in one or more of these
areas.

The Key to Happiness
The first category is your desire for happy relationships. You want to love
and be loved by others. You want to have a happy, harmonious home life. You
want to get along well with the people around you, and you want to earn the
respect of the people you respect. Your involvement in social and community
affairs results from your desire to have happy interactions with others and
to make a contribution to the society you live in.

Enjoy Your Work
The second category is your desire for interesting and challenging work.
You want to make a good living, of course, but more than that, you want to
really enjoy your occupation or profession. The very best times of your
life are when you are completely absorbed in your work.

Become Financially Independent
The third category is your desire for financial independence. You want to
be free from worries about money. You want to have enough money in the bank
so that you can make decisions without counting your pennies. You want to
achieve a certain financial state so that you can retire in comfort and
never have to be concerned about whether or not you have enough money to
support your lifestyle. Financial independence frees you from poverty and a
need to depend upon others for your livelihood. If you save and invest
regularly throughout your working life, you will eventually reach the point
where you will never have to work again.

Enjoy Excellent Health
The fourth and final category is your desire for good health, to be free of
pain and illness and to have a continuous flow of energy and feelings of
well-being. In fact, your health is so central to your life that you take
it for granted until something happens to disrupt it.

Peace of Mind is the Key
Peace of mind is essential for every one of these. The greater your peace
of mind, the more relaxed and positive you are, the less stress you suffer,
the better is your overall health.

The more peace of mind you have, the better are your relationships, the
more optimistic, friendly and confident you are with everyone in your life.
When you feel good about yourself on the inside, you do your work better
and take more pride in it. You are a better boss and coworker. And the
greater your overall peace of mind, the more likely you are to earn a good
living, save regularly for the future and ultimately achieve financial
independence.

Control Your Attention
Life is very much a study of attention. Whatever you dwell upon and think
about grows and expands in your life. The more you pay attention to your
relationships, the quality and quantity of your work, your finances and
your health, the better they will become and the happier you will be.

Action Exercises
Here are three things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, take time on a regular basis to think about what would make you
really happy in each of the four areas.

Second, set specific, measurable goals for improvement in your
relationships, your health, your work and your finances and write them down.

Third, resolve to do something every day to increase the quality of some
area of your life - and then keep your resolution.

Author: Brian Tracy

The End of Procrastination!

People often ask me how to over-come procrastination to
achieve their goals and create the life they truly want.
This week, I discovered two of the essential steps to
dealing with procrastination and making your dreams come
true.

The situation is familiar: We have a vision or goal, and
we know it is within our reach. It may not be simple or
easy, but we KNOW it's possible - if only we would get
started. But we don't. We procrastinate. We plan and
dream and talk, but we fail to take action. Time passes,
things don't change and we berate ourselves in frustration!

That is no way to live your life! Let's look at some
solutions.

Step One: Power comes from Purpose!

This week I talked with three people who have big dreams
and wonderful ideas, but they've taken no action. As we
talked, I realized they have no powerful, passionate
REASONS to succeed. No rational person works long and
hard without a good reason!

They each thought they had reasons. Their dreams are
creative and would make them rich if they succeeded. Their
families support them, and they thought their 'reasons to
succeed' were obvious, but their reasons were really just
cliches, and cliches have no real power in them!

Power comes from purpose! The power to get up early, stay
late, and work hard to achieve a distant goal comes from
your heart. It comes from knowing your purpose, your
REASONS for doing it!

When a teenager wants to make the basketball team, or a
mother wants a doctor for her sick child, or we NEED a
college education, human beings will find a way. But
'nice' goals are not enough.

The power to over-come procrastination, take action, find
solutions and keep going comes from one source: Living
your life on PURPOSE! When you know WHY, you'll find
the HOW!

Step Two: Become a Player!

This is simple: are you an amateur, or a pro? Are you
serious, or are you dabbling? Are you committed, or merely
interested? The answers make all the difference.

Again, I've recently talked with several people who claim
to have a sense of purpose behind their goals, but I don't
think they truly mean it. They 'dabble' and leave no
tracks in the sand.

They tell a great story, and they seem committed, but their
actions are not consistent. At some level, they know that
dabbling rarely brings substantive results, and so they
postpone and procrastinate. Action that has no weight or
substance is hardly worth taking, so over the long-haul,
they make little or no effort to achieve their goals.

Don't be a lightweight! The ancient general, Hannibal, is
famous for taking his troops through impossible mountains
and is remembered for saying, 'We will find a way, or make
one.' He found a way!

To over-come procrastination, be a player! Put some weight
and time and money and skill behind your dreams and make
them happen! Life is not a rehearsal and there are no 'do-
overs'! If you have dreams that call you, be certain you
have enough REASONS to justify the investment, and then go
all out! Put your whole life into it! Procrastination cannot
survive in the face of a committed, determined human will!

Author: Dr Philip E. Humbert

Why Are You Doing This?

Every successful business leader has a clear answer to this
vital question: Why are you building this company? Who
does it serve and what's your greater purpose? Answering
these questions costs you very little, and it can pay huge
dividends.

For some entrepreneurs, the primary purpose is simply to
create a business that can be sold. They have a talent for
seeing a need and designing systems to meet the need while
making a profit, and they love starting new businesses.
Once the company is established, they often sell it and may
repeat the process again and again through the years.

Most business owners, however, have some other purpose in
mind, and it is often deeply personal. Some want to build
a company they can pass on to their children. Others want
to see how large and profitable they can make it, and they
dream of a vast enterprise with thousands of employees.
Still others, want a business that expresses their values
or contributes to society in some way.

In coaching hundreds of entrepreneurs, I am struck that it
does not seem to matter what the reason actually is. What
matters is the ability to keep it in sight at all times.
Knowing your personal vision, your purpose or mission, the
'reason why we do this', is absolutely critical.

The solution is simple: Keep your eyes on the prize! Step
back, gain perspective, renew your commitment. Remember
WHY you are doing this! If you are clear enough about the
'why', you'll figure out the 'how'.

Author: Dr Philip E. Humbert

Do Less, Live More

One of my favorite stories is that when Henry Thoreau told
his friend, Ralph Waldo Emerson, that the key to living
well was to 'simplify, simplify, simplify', Emerson
supposedly replied that, 'one simplify might have sufficed.'
I love the reminder that in many situations, less is more.

The mantra of our age seems to be, 'better, faster, cheaper
and more, more, more!', and the problem is that it's not
always helpful.

This week I told Mary that while the past few weeks have
been unusually busy, and very productive, I'm not having as
much fun as I would like. We are making more, but enjoying
it less, and that's not a good thing!

As we talked it through, it was clear that two different
processes were involved and we had to sort them out.

The first was being clear about our values.

We both love doing stuff, learning things, building things,
starting things. We love things that challenge us or
promise to enrich our lives, so we are suckers for every
great new idea that comes along - and there are lots of
great ideas!

But our values are not around glamour or excitement or
even, primarily around money or success. Our values tend
to be more about relationships, quality time, travel and
education, peace of mind and personal integrity, and the
problem is that our culture rarely encourages or talks
about those things.

The media tends to applaud public displays of wealth or
power or popularity, and our culture celebrates things that
result in 'progress' or tangible profit. And those are
good things! Don't get me wrong - I love both progress
and making a profit!

But, as Emerson observed, 'sometimes money costs too much.'
We noticed that in our rush to jump on several recent
opportunities, we were getting caught up in what Michael
Angier calls 'the thick of thin things' and it wasn't
working for us. A return to personal values is called for.

Secondly, we had failed to plan, and as the saying goes,
'those who fail to plan, are planning to fail.'

In our case, the failures were not obvious. In terms of
profits, we are doing very well, and that is exciting!
It's wonderful to see things come together and to receive
the applause of friends and business associates. It's fun,
it's good - and it's seductive.

We were off balance and off track. We were canceling
private time and postponing important priorities. We were
missing the joy of time together and the daily activities
we value. We had failed to plan, and so the distractions
of life were running away with our schedules, and again,
that is not a recipe for success!

So, we've cut back on activities and are talking about our
values every day. We talk about what we love, what we
cherish, what we stand for. It's not that we had forgotten
these things, but we have realized (again) that it is our
personal responsibility to align ourselves with our values,
and to do it on purpose, every day.

And, we have re-committed to investing time and money and
energy in the things that mean the MOST to us. We have re-
committed to planning our lives, to living from values, and
to making the most of our talents, our relationships, and the
opportunities to live well, rather than to being merely busy.

by Dr Philip Humbert

We Become What We Think About Most

There is great wisdom in the idea that 'we become what we
think about most of the time'. The human brain is a goal-
seeking, problem-solving machine, and the things we think
about, focus on, and worry about inevitably shape our
destiny. We all know this, and yet most of us completely
fail to see (or seize) the opportunity.

Most of us know the computer engineering phrase, 'GIGO',
which usually stands for 'Garbage In, Garbage Out'. If you
give a computer false data or confusing instructions, it
dutifully processes the 'garbage' you put in and gives you
'garbage' back out.

In human terms, however, the phrase can also stand for
'Good In, Good Out'. I like that interpretation much
better!

This week I've been contemplating the things most of us
'put in' to our lives.

As I get older, I may be getting cranky, but there does
seem to be an amazing amount of garbage in our society.
This is the 'awards season' in the entertainment industry
and I see various people, movies, songs and shows being
nominated, and I'm amazed at the garbage that is being
considered 'the best'. Do real people actually watch this
stuff? Do we listen to it, or sit on our couches and bring
it into our homes?

More importantly, do we permit it to enter our brains?

This week, I also had several emails and conversations with
people who really inspire me. One woman, age 67, wrote
that she was considering canceling her subscription to TIPS
because she was no longer going to have any goals except to
'do what I want, have fun and leave this world a little bit
better.' I wrote back that I thought that was 'one of the
noblest goals I've heard in a long time.' I hope she's
still a subscriber!

I talked with a man who is leaving a lucrative law practice
to teach high school math. He'll earn less, but as he
said, '(our) kids are grown, our expenses are down, and I
think I can contribute more that way, than in the boardrooms
where I've spent most of my life.' He's pursuing a grand
dream, and my guess is he'll have the best (and perhaps some
of the worst) days of his life! And he'll know he's alive!
Whoopee!

Several years ago, Michael Clark, gave me a wonderful
phrase. He said, 'When you do what you love, you'll never
work another day the rest of your life.' I love that, and
have (usually) found it to be true.

Sure, some things frustrate me, and sometimes I frustrate
myself, and life throws a curve once in a while, but doing
what we love, what we're good at, and what fulfills us,
changes everything!

In my opinion, if you truly desire to live well, to achieve
much and (perhaps) to make some real money, consider these
two propositions:

1. Refuse to fill your time, your life or your brain with
garbage. Read the best stuff. Talk with the healthiest,
wisest, smartest, most ambitious people you can. Attend
the seminars, learn from the experts! Listen to amazing
music. Sit quietly and listen to the whisperings of your
heart. Laugh a lot. Worship often, and be grateful.

2. Do what you love. You will make your biggest
contribution when you passionately pursue your talents and
use your strengths. Martin Luther King, Jr. did many great
things, but perhaps his greatest moment came in Washington,
DC when he proclaimed, 'I have a dream!' We all remember
that, and millions have been inspired by it. What's your
dream?

Some of us can change jobs or move around the world
whenever we wish. For others, there are responsibilities
and obligations and things take more time, but in the end,
life is to be lived and it requires our very best. Life,
and true success, will never settle for anything less.

By Dr Philip E. Humbert